Chapter News

2021 Am-Am is in the Books

2021 Am-Am is said and done. Luckily the wind held off long enough to get the tourney in. Read on for a tourney wrap-up as told by the one and only Andy Butler!

On a blustery March morning, 23 competitors emerged to kick off the 2021 SpoMga season. Just past the Shari’s lay the course in the heart of the north, Wandermere. A stout par 70, the functioning alcoholics banded together to find fairways, GIRs, fringes and bunkers.

 Shortly thereafter, Taylor Reed nestled a tee shot spitting distance from the flag on hole 2 to take home the KP and become the milkshake of all the boys’ yards.

 Drives were piped, sprayed and absolutely pissed on throughout the day, but none more so than from father Mayfield who straight-laced a burner up the gut of number 7 like it was his job.

Excitement grew after 18 holes in the clubhouse where it was announced that 2 teams tied and were forced into a putt-off for this years’ AM-AM trophy. Andy Benson, Embay Lee, Nick Kovarik and Andy Butler took to the green for a windy tap-sesh. Clutch as fuck and after a sorry 3-putt from arguably the handsomest mother fucker in the group, Embay popped in the 2 putt to seal the victory for his team.

Cards in and cups-full, the results followed:

·       Team Winners: Andy Benson and Embay Lee

·       Most Mediocre: Jon Dresback

·       Gross Score winner with a 75: Taylor XXXX

·       Key to the red tees with a 119: Joseph Van Voorhis

And with a solid mother fuckin 86 Scott of House Kaulig dawned the black, grabbed the fat check and showed us all that winter ain’t coming but is finally fucking over as the true KING IN DA NORTH, DA KING IN THE NORTH!!! Your Chapter leader Scott Kaulig starting it off right with a W.

Thanks to everyone who showed out, and big ups to the winners of the team event and the overall tourney with his sweet, sweet new driver. 

We will see you shitbags next month at the totally politically correctly named Indian Canyon course for this year’s Bastards. For extra fun at that course, take a shot every time you do not get a flat lie.